Another Day at the U

Well school starts again, probably a good thing to get my mind off Josh. Ugh these few weeks have been hard, even though we still talk, it's still hurts to know he's not mine and i have to move on and so does he.

 

So far my classes seem like hell, but more like a dark pit of stress. I have to have stories every week , while writing stories, filming them, and being an anchor for my class, oh and a producer, director and learn the technological side of news. Just a lot to take in. Then again I'm going to be a senior soon so i should assume my classes are going to be sucky, and a lot of hard work. TV Journalism sounds the hardest, but i think i'm going to really understand what i want to do with my future with that class. 

 

In other news i decided to try Tinder, this weird dating app where I have talked to a guy who straight up said "If we hang out we should make out." 

 

And another wanted to see me in my sexy underwear... that i apparently have. Don't worry he's been blocked.

 

And the rest are all from the Y. Which honestly i'm not interested in dating anyone right now, I just need a self esteem booster, and knowing some guys out there think I'm cute. So far about 40 guys have liked me, which is nice. Well back to school. Peace OUT!

 

The Attributes

I've decided after a short thought that the attributes of each of these real life men or their roles in films would make one fine man! 

The voice of

The spunk and humor of

The loyalty and patriotism of

The brains and money of

The spirituality of 

The wittiness of 

AND the looks and body of

and there ya go. Fine me one please. And then i will do this...

GRAHHH!!

WHY ARE YOU STILL TALKING TO ME?!

I KNOW I SHOULD BE TALKING TO YOU BUT NOT. IT'S A WHOLE THING BUT YEAH. 

Awkward Moments

So I wasn't planning on going to FHE last night, but my friend made a deal with me that we'd sit in the back and leave right after. You have to know our ward had a Peter Breinholt concert, and I like his music. I wanted to see Peter Brienholt so bad, but I didn't want to see Mark!. Well I got home and I had some texts I had gotten while I was driving home. One was from my friend Erica, the other *sigh* Mark. He wrote "Please come to FHE tonight! You can sit by me :)"

As much as I wanted to reply and say "Yes I would love to" I didn't. I"ll admit I miss him and it's only been like 2 days! How pathetic?! Well anyways my friend convinced me to go and we sat in the back like she promised and we watched the concert. But anytime everyone looked back to see who was asking Peter a question I was all like

So afterwards I was ready to bail but no my friends got caught up in conversations. I was like "WE NEED TO EFFN GO!" Mark was there but on the opposite side, and already talking to a new girl. But low and behold Aaron comes running over and gives me a huge hug. "You doing ok?" "I'm doing alright, a long night but..." When really I was ready to cry because Peter's first song basically described my last date with Mark. But Aaron said that he was on my side about the whole thing, so I have a feeling he knows something I don't. When I texted him later asking him what Mark said about breaking up with me he said he'd tell me later in person. I don't get it. Anyway the girl Mark was talking to came over and started chatting with Aaron, Mark and I made eye contact and he game trotting over like nothing was wrong, but on the inside I was like...

But I put on the brave face and was a nice person, when I really wanted to just cry, or get mad, or both. Right now personally I just lost a friend, even though we said we'd try to be friends, but I tried that with Aaron and everyday was a living hell, knowing he liked another girl and I was just there. It's gonna be a while till I can go back and act like nothing happened. Mark is a sweetheart, he just has some issues that are beyond his control, which those reasons are probably why he broke up with me. Even though he had three lame ass excuses, not sure which one to believe. Well I'm gonna have a good cry tonight because this just sucks.

What The?

So last night I'm getting ready to go to a movie with Gordon and his buddies when I get a text from Mark. I was surprised, i mean we were texting earlier that day but this one stopped me in my tracks. "Hey so do you need space?"

Um... yeah him and i have been going out the past 4 weeks. So i reply, "what do you mean?" Of course i know what he means, but I wasn't sure what he was implying. "I feel like I'm taking you away from your friends." "Not at all why do you think that?" "Because we've been hanging out every weekend." "Yeah so? I don't hate it, do you?" The way that was texted probably sounded pissed, but i wasn't. I just hate guys mind games. So retarded. Who's with me?!

To continue "No, I love it! I Just worry about your friends." Anyway we concluded we like hanging out with each other and we want to go out this weekend again. I told him I'd plan it this time. I have no idea what to do. Should be interesting. He told me he likes talkin to me and hanging out with me. Kids is still the most quiet kid ever, but we'll see how things go. I still have a hard time trusting him, but people change right? He needs some growing up to do. But then again I REALLY want to take his VL. Does that make me a bad person?

Worth the Wait

He's so cute and he asked me out again! I AM VICTORIOUS!!

BUT I AM! Came back to the house and jammed to ET by Katy Perry! MWAHA! 

Singin in the Rain

BEST MOVIE EVER! OK well Lord of the Rings is still number one but I freakin love that movie, and not just because Donald O'connor is the love of my life...

... but because it's happy and there's nothing sad about it, there's just pure joy through the whole movie. Dancing, singing, and it rains lol it's just fantastic. Always will be in my top 5 favorites!!! Along with LOTR, Inception, Wizard of Oz, and The Avengers.
So went with my friend Buffy who loves movies just as much as me and yes afterwards she was like "Donald is a lot like Aaron."

Believe me i know this, which is why i probably like him so much... meaining Donald. OK yes i admit i still like Aaron but if he still wants to be more then friends he can do it, I said what I had to say and there.
BUT all in all SINGING IN THE RAIN IS SO WICKED AWESOME! I can't stop thinking about how awesome Gene Kelly is. He choreographed every dance... except Make Em Laugh... well a few parts he did but Donald did most of it. SO fantastic YOU TWO YOU ARE JUST MY FAVORITE MEN TO EVER WALK THIS EARTH! I want them!!

New Girl is Amazing

Ha yes i love New Girl. I'm not sure if you knew that yet, it's just such a fantastic show. I've come to realize that i do have guy friends like Schmidt, Nick and Winston. My guy friends and who they are. Good thing they don't read this or they might kill me.

Schmidt is hands down Aaron. Home maker, a little obsessive about things, and kind of a geek. PS don't use his towel or dirty his car. Oh wow this is kind of creepy.

Nick is definitely Gordon... i think. Probably the most normal, but him and i can make jokes and go off on tangents and it makes life silly. Nick is silly and he's obsessed with having a girlfriend just like Gordon. Wow life would be insane if all of these guy friends lived with me.

And last Ryan is definitely Winston. They both love sports, spend their life with sports and yes there we go. He wants to be a free spirit and he is, and he secretly has embarrassing things he does. It's so fantastic! It's so awesome! lol i can see him singing Defying Gravity on his way to Mexico.

Yup this is what i do on my nights off. Exciting right? lol well back to more NEW GIRL!!!

Oh Life is Awkward

I'm bored to be completely honest with you. My family is having home teachers over and here I am in a Singles Ward and I don't even know who my home teachers are :) YAY!

So tonight I'm having a friend come over and watch Sherlock Holmes: Game of Shadows because he has not seen it. For some odd reason I am so nervous. Here is why.

So this guy, I've known him for a while, but i wasn't ever really friends with him, my older sis who is really good friends with him has always been like "you'd love him! You guys have so much in common you'd get along, on you two are going to get married." and i'm like....

My parents love him to! My dad thinks he's just the most awesome kid, which he's so great, but what am i thinking it's only like tonight right? Just focus on tonight. Oh here's the story...

Saturday I went to a party with Aaron and he was there. I hardly talked to him, I mean I guess I was a bit of a flirt, but with another guy (who is so cute), but I did talk to him, the guy (I'm not dropping names). Left the party, then Sunday night he started chatting with me via Facebook. It was fun he's way sweet and then he asked me for my number. I saw it coming but yeah, for the past 2 days we've been texting non stop. It's kind of scary because of what my sister has always said. I mean i'm not expecting to marry him, but i feel a lot of pressure to have to get a long with him ya know? I'll give him a chance, i'm not that shallow... even though i turned down a guy last week... but anyways I just need to get that out. Oh life is awkward isn't it? Wish me luck tonight!

I'm no Hitch

For the past while people have been asking me for relationship advice.

 

Yeah i thought the same thing. I've never been in a relationship, I mean yes I have seen how relationships fail but heck when it comes to relationships there are no rules, the one rule is to be yourself, and your best self. Everyone is going to approach a relationship in a different way. Some people like forward, some people like not forward, some people take it slow, fast, I mean everyone is different. 

Oh why i brought this up? OK so last week my friend texted me till 2 in the morning wondering what to do about a guy, first of all she's like 5 years older then him and in the end he was the jerk that ended it. A random TOTALLY random stranger at a fireside handed me his phone and was like "is my girlfriend mad at me?" 

My friend in New Zealand wrote me a novel about a girl wondering what he should do about it. I can't even physically see the guy. 

How am I supposed to know? Then my buddies John and Josh were asking me all these questions about girls and what are good signs and what are bad signs and how they should approach the situation. I'm like guys this is so awkward. Especially when you'd like to date one of them and now they know "the signs"

Well i just had to rant. When it comes to relationships don't ask me. I've already failed at a relationship, never been in one and really not trying to look for one right now. 

Been a While

WOOOW! So much has happened. Emotional roller coasters. Bottom line Aaron has decided he's not sure how he feels about me, wants to remain friends and see where we go because he likes what we have and yeah. There's a lot more to the story, if you want to know more you can ask me because I'm honestly sick and tired of talking about it and analyzing it, and today was a good day because I didn't think about it AT ALL! Sure I talked to him but nothing amazing. I'm going to go out with other guys and drink lots of water, and focus on me, go with the flow.

In other news well there really isn't.

I can't wait to start at the U! It's like my dreams are coming true in a way. I've always wanted to go into news and media and this is like the first step. I want to work for ESPN, ahah i watched it for like 3 hours with Ryan yesterday.

Random: I want 5 Guys. Or a burger in general. I've been craving one since St George. It was fun for a while, but when the friends that you have there all like anime, you kind of feel left out. I mean there is NO WAY IN HELL i am going to like anime. I have been brought up my whole life to dislike it, and sure I'll watch it with them but the whole time i'm thinking "i could be watching something with more class, and talent". No offense but anime is pathetic. I could rant on and on and on about it! If you like it whatever you do what you do, but don't try to get me to like it because it just makes me hate it more.

Well it's time for bed. That's the update of my life. I need new friends, a new environment, and maybe a new hair cut. I need my bangs back.