Weird Moments

You know those moments where you feel like you have no time to do anything, yet you think to yourself, hey I have three days to do what i need to do. It's just the worst when you have to rely on other people to fulfill their assignment in order for you to do yours.

. 

I learned from an early age that relying on people is not the way to go in life. Which is kind of sad, but really relying on people who can't even get a simple assignment done yeah. Writing a script for a news show is going to be harder than expected. 

I'm really kind of sick of people thinking that i have it easy. At work i wanted to punch my co-workers in the face. Really the only one in that group that can say they don't have time to do anything is Ryan because he has kids and no car. My boss on the other hand goes home and eats pizza and tevos her stupid reality shows. My other co-worker plays online games. They really have no right to tell me that their lives are busier than mine. THEIR WORK DOESN'T FOLLOW THEM HOME!!!! I HAVE WORK EVERY NIGHT SON! I'm almost to the point of an emotional break down. 

Yeah i know i should be willing to talk face to face with someone about this and vent, but i still have this thing where no one really cares, even my adoring boyfriend, i had a hard time even sharing my feelings with the former boyfriend. I just feel like no one wants to watch someone cry. Which is true, but no one really wants to console you because they can't fix it and they don't know what to do. 

OK i gotta stop being so stressed, but really i wanna hide and avoid people, which is bad. Like i'd love to just get away with Andrew or another friend, but someone who will remind me that life is ok no matter what. Is it bad that i can't do that? I dunno. This blog might be more over dramatic then it should, i mean it's one in the morning. meh oh well. 

I'm sick of always being there for people and hearing their problems and trying to help. but there really isn't anyone there for me. 

Storm Has Passed

But life has been good to me lately, except a lack of sleep. The Lord blessed me in that i had time to finish my news story since things just kept getting thrown in my face, church callings, friends being dumped. and now i have *cue trumpets* Andrew!

Things are moving so fast with him, but it feels so right. He makes me feel like a million dollars and says things that make me speechless. That does happen. Every night that we've hung out... which has been every night since Monday it's so hard to say bye. We talk for hours, we start watching a movie but then we just talk through the movie.

The funny thing with him is that i've known of him and he's known of me since we were like four. He's my best friend growing up's cousin. He's also really good friends with Aaron. So when he came off his mission last year i already know who he was. I have always had a little thing for him, he's very attractive and has such a fun personality that i clicked with. Apparntly it's crossed his mind too, which made me feel awesome. 

Anyway it's been almost three weeks since we started dating. It's been really great and yes I have seen him everyday, except last Thursday because of the football game, and tonight he has to study. But he still calls me and plans lunch dates just to see me. I shouldn't be so excited but i am. Then again it's that honeymoon stage. 

This weekend i'll be down in St George with him and his family, this will be interesting. I'm SO SO SO excited, yet so scared at the same time. I shouldn't be, but i am, but a good scared. Well tomorrow we have a lunch date, and he's coming over to watch a scary movie, then Saturday we're off to St George till Tuesday!